I SAMUEL 25 lesson # 25
GETTING BY WITH A LITTLE HELP
I. Introduction:
Q Have you ever been stopped from making a crucial mistake by a friend’s advice?
Q Would you like to share one such experience with us?
Note: Our chapter opens with David having done the right thing in chapter 24. Saul had been hunting him like an animal, trying to kill him since chapter 18 and he had only done good to Saul. Even Saul admits that David is more righteous than he (24:17), but that confession was not heard by the nation, just by some of the troops. David is still on the run. So with this in mind our chapter opens…
II. Setting the Scene to an Encounter. I Samuel 25:1-22.
A. The Seemingly Last Chance for Public Vindication. I Samuel 25:1
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:1
Q Who knows that Saul has been rejected by God and David has been anointed?
An = Samuel and now he is dead. The author could be saying that David has lost one of his key allies and the one person who really understands the situation with Saul. David obviously does not feel free to return home. He goes down into the wilderness.
B. Introducing the Key Characters. I Samuel 25:2-3.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:2-3
Note: These verses are introducing all the new key characters to the story.
Q What do we learn about Nabal?
An = He was wealthy, with a huge ranch; and that he was coarse and mean.
Q What do we learn about his wife?
An = Her name is Abigail. She was intelligent and beautiful and obviously the wife of an important and powerful man.
C. The Legitimate Request. I Samuel 25:4-9.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:4-9.
Q Do you know why David would feel free to ask for something at sheep sheering time?
An = This was a harvest festival. Just like in many places today in the agricultural world there are “harvest festivals” for the workers at the end of the season. This is one such occasion. The owner is expected to pay for the feast, much like the “Christmas Party” in the corporate world where the “boss” pays for the liquor. David saw himself as an employee of Nabal because he had guarded Nabal’s flocks. Nabal lived on the edge of civilization and raiding bands were always a problem. David, in a sense worked for free, and was only asking for a good meal at “harvest time”. David was making a legitimate request and he did so politely.
D. The Illegitimate Refusal and the Act of Transference. I Samuel 25:10-13.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:10-13.
Q How did David take the news?
An = He was planning on a massacre. He totally lost his temper. >> Have someone read I Samuel 25:21-22. David was planning on killing every male in the entire ranching operation.
Q Three good fighters, who are armed, could easily kill a group of unarmed ranch hands, but how many men is David taking to do the job?
An = 400. This is easily understood as “over-kill”. David is ticked!
Q What angers David so much? What did Nabal do that warrants the death penalty?
An = Nothing Nabal did warranted the death penalty. David spared and forgave the man who tried to kill him 9 times and had a great spiritual triumph in chapter 24. However, Nabal’s speech reminded him of what Saul had done to his reputation: “Many servants are breaking away from their masters these days”. David is perceived way out in the back country as a “run-away”, a low-life, as “non-righteous”.
Note: Nabal reminds David of Saul. A powerful, ungrateful, unjust, insulting, punitive authority. What is going on here is what some would call “transference”. Nabal is reaping what Saul had done to David. Nabal is not “God’s anointed” and deep down inside David has had it with abusive, unjust, ungrateful authorities in his life. David had done all the right things and still he is a fugitive with a “bad and incorrect reputation”.
Q Have you ever gotten mad at someone over a minor thing when the real reason you were mad had to do with someone or something else?
An = A lot of men kick the dog, yell at their roommate, abuse their wives, when they are really mad at what happened at work, in class, or what was done by a relative, etc. They transfer their anger from a truly bad situation and explode on someone who just happens to be the next person who gets them angry.
D. The Legitimate Response of Abigail. I Samuel 25:14-20.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:14-20.
Q When the men’s lives were on the line who did they go to for help?
An = Abigail. They know their master is a “wicked man who no one can talk to” (25:17). Notice that she hustles and knows how to “get things organized and rolling”. This is a woman of great organizational strengths and abilities. The men respect and trust her, and she knows how to give precise and definite orders. This woman knows how to act under stress. This is not some a woman who breaks down in a crisis.
III. The Encounter. I Samuel 25:23-35.
A. Opening words of Wisdom. I Samuel 25:23-25.
Note: David was about to commit murder and ruin innocent lives and become no better than Saul in his massacre of the innocent priests at Nob. His spiritual life is on the line and so what can be done to prevent someone from destroying their lives in anger? Abigail’s work and humility will save David’s soul.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:23-25.
Q What does Abigail show David that Nabal failed to show?
An = Respect. She does this in several ways. First she bows down to David (25:23). Here is a beautiful and noble woman bowing down to the ground. I do not know about you, but if a beautiful woman bowed to me it would affect me and get my attention. Then she calls herself his “maidservant” three times, which she certainly was not. Abigail was a high-society woman, the wife of a very wealthy man.
Q What is Abigail doing in verse 25?
An = She is calling “a spade, a spade”. She is acknowledging that there was injustice done to David. David needed to hear that Nabal was wrong. We may know we have done the right thing, but we need to hear others say it as well.
Q Has this ever happened to you?
Q Can you think of a time where this would have helped you when you were mistreated?
Q Can you think of a time when this can be done by you for others in the near future?
B. Making Requests: Providing Direction and Offering An Alternative. I Samuel 25:26-27.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:26-27.
Q What is Abigail doing now? What is she assuming?
An = She is assuming he will change his plans. This is the key thing. She does not start with the request for him to stop nor does she end with it. Verse 26 is a daring and bold remark on her part. She is taking for granted his conformity to her wishes, which she had already termed as God’s restraining hand. She, in essence, was already congratulating him on following God’s will, which she identified boldly (and correctly) with her own agenda of stopping the murder. She named his planned actions for what they were: bloodshed and personal vengeance. This woman had guts.
Q Does she give him a way to save face? How?
An = She gives him a tangible gift. She gives him what started the crisis in the first place: the “festive meal”. Finally, he got what he deserved. In addition, the gift was a practical expression of her feelings and a tangible expression of her words that David had indeed been slighted. Sometimes a practical gift is needed (Proverbs 21:14).
Q When we challenge someone’s course of action, do we need to give them alternatives to their damaged egos, like the gift offered by Abigail?
Q Can you think of modern examples from your own lives?
C. The Promise of a Future and A Grim Reminder. I Samuel 25:28-31.
Note: Abigail is not done. She needs to repeat some issues and add another new element to her persuasive attempt with David.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:28-31.
Q Does she open her final appeal with another show of humility in verse 28? How?
An = She again calls herself his “maidservant”, something she will do six times within her speech: twice in 24, and once in 25,27,28 and 31.
Q How important is humility in the face of anger? How persuasive is it?
Note: Now she repeats something she has said before and does so twice: she tells him that revenge and the will of God are not compatible (28 c and 31 a). She continues to tell him if you do not stop you will become a murderer and become guilty of innocent blood (31).
Q Is it important to repeat to angry people, with variety, with gentleness, what the consequences of their actions will be?
Q What is the new element in her argument which is found in 25:29-30?
An = David has a glorious future that he does not need to stain or mar. She uses a beautiful metaphor of God holding David in the bundle of the living (the place where one wraps up one’s money or valuables in a cloth around one’s stomach and the enemies of David being flung out like being hurled out of a sling shot, certainly a item David knows something about. She is reminding David of his future.
Q When we speak with the angry do we need to hold out to them a positive future?
Note: She ends her speech again with humility: calling herself a maidservant and asking him to remember her when he has achieved success.
D. David’s Response: I Samuel 25:32-35.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:32-35.
Q Does David respond positively?
An = In the NASB, which reflects the Hebrew a bit more accurately, there are three uses of the term “blessed”. David addresses Abigail and blesses her three times. First, David blesses God and recognizes that God was active in her action and her being sent to stop him. David sees the hand of God in his personal history, because of Abigail’s work (25:33). What a great gift to give someone! They get to see God’s hand at work in their lives when they are so discouraged. Second, he blesses her discernment. In other words, he recognizes someone else’s intelligence. We are back to mental health ourselves when we can recognize other’s abilities. Third, David blesses her work and acknowledges that he was wrong. He thanks her for telling him he was going to sin! She rang his bell and he was thankful!
Note: He blesses because he is returning to the state of blessedness himself. He sees God active in his life (33), he sees other’s intelligence (34 a) and he sees his own delusion and sinful direction (34 b). All three of these attitudes are the signs of seeing reality and being blessed.
Q Does it pay to listen to others when we are angry?
An = Yes it does. We cannot succeed in the Christian life without help from others. We cannot make it alone. We need help and we need to listen to “intelligent” people. Wisdom should be listened to, no matter what the source, even if it comes from the wife of an enemy. In addition, the Bible is clearly saying that “intelligent” women are to be listened to.
IV. The Conclusion to the Encounter: Blessing and a New Start. I Samuel 25:36-44.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:36-38.
Q What happens to Nabal?
An = The news of his narrow escape compelled him into a stroke. Ten days later he died.
>>>> Have someone read I Samuel 25:39-44.
Note: Did God take care of Abigail?
Q If we review, how can we be Abigail’s?
An = I see her speech as having three main parts.
1) Taking away the sting:
a. showing respect and humility
b. acknowledging that injustice had taken place.
2) Offering New Direction and A Face Saving Alternative:
a. creatively challenging the potential sin or inappropriate behavior.
b. giving the gift: a way out of the humiliation done to the individual.
3) Repetition and Hope:
a. She repeats her attitude of humility and twice reminds him of his potential sin.
b. She holds out a bright future and a motivation for not messing-up now.
See attached chart as well.
I Samuel 25: Two Outlines
First Outline of I Samuel 25:23-31
I. Reverse the Experienced Behavior
1. She showed regard and honor to the injured and angry person.
2. She verbally acknowledged that injustice had taken place.
II. Challenge the Inappropriate Behavior
3. Called for change in behavior and assumed it would take place.
4. She confronted him with his inappropriate intentions.
5. She again showed honor and acknowledged injustice.
III. Do a Tangible Deed
6. She did something tangible and physical like the gift of food.
IV. Repeat the Truth
7. Reminded him that revenge and God’s will were incompatible.
8. Again assumed positive behavior would take place.
9. She again showed humility and respect.
Second Outline of I Samuel 25: 23-31
I. Initial Approach: Reverse the Behavior 23-25
A. Show respect by body language: bowed, dismounted,
terms used: maidservant
B. Verbally acknowledge that blame has taken place
II. Main Challenge: Call for Change in David’s Behavior 26
A. Oath: that this is God’s will and is serious
B. Assume the best behavior and tell them
C. Tell the true nature of their action
D. Promise them the proper positive results
III. A Physical Action that helps reconciliation: a gift 27
IV. Remind Them: Hold Out Promise, Threaten, Show Humility 28-31
A. Ask them to forgive us: show humility
B. Promise/Compliment: show their positive future with God
C. Threat: wrong action leaves out God and brings regret
D. Again show humility by asking for a favor